What Does Ghosted Mean in Dating?

Ghosted means someone stops all communication with you without explanation. They don't respond to your texts, calls, or messages after you've been talking, matching on apps, or going on dates. The person who ghosts you ignores every attempt you make to reach them. This ends the relationship or interaction through silence rather than a conversation.

How Ghosting Works on Dating Apps

People ghost at different stages of dating. Some stop responding after matching on an app. Others disappear after the first date or several weeks of dating. The pattern stays the same: communication stops completely and permanently.

On dating apps, ghosting looks like unmatching without warning. The person's profile disappears from your chat list. On social media, they stop replying to direct messages. They might still view your stories or like your posts, but they won't respond when you message them.

A 2023 Research Co. poll found that 55% of Canadians have been ghosted. Among those cases, 23% happened during dating. These numbers show how common ghosting has become in online dating.

Related Dating Terms You Should Know

Soft ghosting happens when someone gives minimal responses instead of cutting contact completely. They send one-word replies or react with emojis only. They "like" your message without writing back. This often happens before full ghosting.

Zombie-ing occurs when someone who ghosted you comes back. They start liking your old photos or send a "hey stranger" text months later. They act like nothing happened and don't acknowledge their disappearance.

Breadcrumbing overlaps with soft ghosting. The person sends occasional messages to keep you interested. They never make plans or move the relationship forward. These low-effort messages might continue for weeks before they ghost completely.

Simmering or icing means slowing down communication without ending it. Response times get longer. Messages become shorter. The person seems less interested but hasn't disappeared yet.

Why People Ghost

People ghost to avoid uncomfortable conversations. Ending a relationship directly feels harder than disappearing. This pattern shows up more in app-based dating, where you haven't met the person face-to-face.

Some people ghost as a stress response. When intimacy or conflict feels overwhelming, they flee instead of addressing it. BetterHelp's medically reviewed content from July 2025 describes this as an avoidance reaction rather than a mental disorder.

Dating apps make ghosting easier. You can unmatch with one button. You never see the person again. The apps provide many matches, so losing one connection feels less important. As one expert told The Eyeopener in February 2025, "There are so many points in an exchange of information where it drops off that could be considered ghosting."

People with attachment anxiety often ghost to protect themselves from vulnerability. Past relationship trauma can make someone more likely to disappear rather than risk rejection or conflict.

How Ghosting Affects You

Being ghosted causes confusion and hurt. You wonder what went wrong. You check your phone repeatedly. You reread old messages looking for clues. Mental health professionals describe these reactions as normal responses to unexplained rejection.

The lack of closure makes ghosting particularly hard. You don't know if the person lost interest, met someone else, or had an emergency. This uncertainty leads to rumination and self-doubt.

Ghosting erodes trust in dating. When multiple people ghost you, you might expect everyone to disappear. You might hold back emotionally to protect yourself from future ghosting.

Warning Signs Someone Might Ghost

Watch for these patterns:

• Replies get slower and shorter
• They move from sentences to single words
• They send emojis instead of actual responses
• They stop asking you questions
• They're always "busy" when you suggest meeting
• They only text late at night
• They view your stories but don't reply to messages

On dating apps, warning signs include:

• Taking days to respond after initially chatting regularly
• Giving vague answers about meeting in person
• Canceling plans without rescheduling
• Disappearing mid-conversation, then returning days later

What to Do When Someone Ghosts You

Send one follow-up message if you want closure. Keep it short. After that, stop reaching out. The person's silence tells you what you need to know.

Block or unfollow them on social media if seeing their profile causes distress. This prevents you from checking their activity or hoping they'll return.

Remember that ghosting shows the other person's communication problems, not your worth. People who ghost struggle with direct communication and boundary setting.

Talk to friends or a therapist if ghosting triggers past trauma or ongoing distress. Processing the experience helps you move forward.

When Ghosters Return

If someone who ghosted you reappears, proceed carefully. They might send a casual message pretending nothing happened. They might like your photos or watch your stories before reaching out.

Ask them to acknowledge and explain their disappearance before continuing contact. If they won't discuss what happened, they'll probably ghost again.

Most relationship experts recommend not reengaging unless the person takes responsibility for ghosting and demonstrates changed behavior.

Better Alternatives to Ghosting

If you want to end contact with someone, send a brief message instead of disappearing. Here are example texts:

After a few messages: "Thanks for chatting. I don't feel a connection and won't be continuing. Best wishes."

After a date: "Thank you for meeting up. I don't feel romantic chemistry and won't be pursuing this further. Take care."

For safety concerns: "I'm ending this conversation. Please don't contact me again." Then block them.

When you're not ready to date: "I'm not available to date right now and don't want to waste your time. Good luck."

Platform-Specific Ghosting Patterns

Each dating platform has its own ghosting dynamics. On apps with many matches, people often stop responding to multiple conversations at once. They might ghost ten matches simultaneously when they focus on one person.

Apps that show when someone was last online create additional anxiety. You can see the person is active but ignoring you. Some apps let you "unmatch" instantly, making ghosting feel less personal than blocking someone's phone number.

Social media platforms blur the lines. Someone might stop replying to direct messages but continue watching your stories. This creates confusion about whether you've been ghosted or they're taking space.

Age and Cultural Differences

Younger adults who grew up with dating apps experience more ghosting. They match with more people and have more simultaneous conversations. Each interaction feels less unique when you're managing multiple matches.

Different cultures have varying expectations about response times and communication endings. What counts as ghosting in one context might seem like normal fading in another. Some users view non-response among numerous app matches as standard rather than ghosting.

The definition of ghosting itself varies. Some people consider it ghosting only after meeting in person. Others feel ghosted when someone stops responding after matching but before any real conversation.