What is Ghosting?

Definition

Ghosting means stopping all contact with someone you have been talking to, dating, or seeing. It usually happens with no warning, no explanation, and no goodbye. One person decides to ignore texts, calls, or messages, and the other is left waiting and guessing. The word first appeared online in the early 2000s, connected to new ways of meeting people through apps and social media.

How Ghosting Happens

Ghosting often starts with slow replies or canceled plans before all contact stops. Later, the person might block, unmatch, or remove social media access. Sometimes, there is no trace left at all. Some people try “soft ghosting,” where they take longer to reply each time before stopping contact. Others keep watching the other person’s posts without talking, a habit called “orbiting”.

Ghosting is easier on apps and social sites, which allow people to cut off others with one click. Studies show many people use these tools instead of having a direct talk when ending things.

How Common Is Ghosting

A 2014 YouGov survey said 10 percent of Americans had ghosted a romantic partner to end things. Studies in recent years show between 13 and 72 percent of app users have been either the ghoster or the ghosted, depending on age and relationship type. About 33 percent report being ghosted, and 25 percent admit they have done it to someone else.

More young people, such as Gen Z, say that ghosting is an acceptable way to leave a conversation or relationship, even if it still hurts. In a 2024 study, 78 percent of Gen Zers thought ghosting was okay before the third date, while only 41 percent of millennials said the same.

Signs of Ghosting

Some signals include always having an excuse for not meeting, not answering questions about plans, or changing the subject when things get personal. Online, ghosters may unfriend, unmatch, or block the person’s account. They may keep viewing public posts but say nothing.

Effects of Ghosting

People who are ghosted may feel rejected, anxious, or confused. Some studies show that about 34 percent of ghosted people experience sadness or trouble trusting again for at least six months. Mental health experts compare the pain of ghosting to physical pain, seen in similar brain patterns. Up to 18 percent said they became more careful or skeptical in future connections after being ghosted.

Some ghosters also say they feel guilt, but often feel it is easier to avoid hard talks. A study from 2025 said women were over twice as likely as men to seek mental health services after being ghosted.

Why People Ghost

Ghosting is often about not wanting to face a difficult or awkward conversation. In a 2024 study, 68 percent of ghosters did it to avoid conflict, 53 percent because talking to many people on apps is tiring, and 39 percent said they were too busy for a direct goodbye.

Some experts say the design of dating apps and social media encourages ghosting. People learn they can disappear with few consequences, so the same pattern repeats.

What Data Shows

Users who send more messages on dating apps are slightly more likely to ghost than those who use the apps less often, but frequent users can also learn to match with people more carefully, which can mean less ghosting over time. About 63 percent think it is fine to ghost early in a conversation. Only 14 percent think it is acceptable after things have become serious.

Social media shows more people are talking about ghosting. For example, “ghosted” mentions online went up by 440 percent in the last five years. Videos and posts about ghosting, including recovery advice and personal stories, draw high attention, especially on platforms like TikTok and YouTube. Hashtags like #ghostingtherapy have billions of views. Dating app profiles asking for “no ghosting” rose by almost 90 percent since 2023.

Ghosting in Everyday Life

Stories in news reports include someone vanishing after finding out about cheating, people regretting ghosting long after, and others using ghosting when worried about safety or not knowing how else to end things. Most ghosting happens in romantic settings, but it can show up in friendships or even at work. Legal cases remain rare, but some people have reported them in job settings. Some words related to ghosting: - Breadcrumbing — sending messages now and then, with no intent to commit. - Simmering — keeping someone “on hold” by replying only when convenient. - Icing — telling someone things are paused but not saying when, or if, things will pick up again.